William Mitchell felt like a king on the streets of San Francisco. He had the face and body of a movie star, a coveted job, a dream salary, a beautiful girlfriend, a wealth of friends and parties every weekend.

In July 1971, at age 28, he was feeling particularly on top of the world: he had just received his first pilot’s license and was on his way home, riding a large, luxurious motorcycle he had bought a day earlier at a motorcycle market. As fate would have it, on that of all days, a truck ran a red light and slammed into him. He was thrown from the bike, breaking his shoulder and pelvis. The tank’s fuel cap was thrown off as well and gasoline began pouring over him — within seconds, a spark from the engine turned him into a human torch. He was rushed to the hospital. Doctors gave him a 50% chance of survival.

Mitchell lay unconscious for two weeks. When he came to, he gradually discovered that his face was scarred and disfigured, all his fingers had been amputated, and 65% of his body was covered in severe burns.

In the fog of pain and helplessness, three principles he had learned throughout his life surfaced in his memory — three thin threads of light that showed him, in his darkest hour, a doorway of hope.

1. You Alone Are Responsible for Your Life

Mitchell’s condition required around-the-clock medical supervision and intensely painful treatment. “You cannot even imagine an injury from burns at that level. It is the most catastrophic, difficult and painful condition a human being can endure,” he heard his doctor say. “It’s as if your skin is being stripped off anew every single day.” Mitchell described all of this in his book, It’s Not What Happens to You.

Despite the presence of two dedicated private nurses, Mitchell felt like a limp marionette. His ability to endure steadily eroded until one day he asked to die. In response, his doctor came into the room and made an unconventional offer: Mitchell himself would manage his own treatment plan. Since only he knew how much he could bear, the doctor explained, they would go through the treatment plan together item by item, and Mitchell would decide how to proceed and what to forgo.

Taking responsibility for his treatment was like an empowerment bomb. The word responsibility is derived from response and ability — and for Mitchell, that meaning was fully realized: active participation in the process gave him both the ability and the willingness to control, even if only slightly, his own condition.

“You alone are responsible for your life,” he recalled a principle he had learned long before, and now, precisely in the depths of hardship, he was given the chance to truly live it.

Mitchell’s insight echoes the story of Ken Campbell, who in 1983 survived a nearly identical accident: a fuel truck hit his car and burned 75% of his body at the most severe burn degree. Doctors said he would not make it. But when he regained consciousness, he declared that he alone was responsible for his life — and chose to survive. When doctors claimed he would never walk again, he got up. When they warned he could never compete in an Ironman triathlon, he crossed the finish line in tears of victory.

Mitchell spent four months in hospital. One caregiver who left a deep impression on him was his physiotherapist, Beverley. In his imagination, in her past, she had been a marine combat fitness instructor — tough, rigid, merciless, and uncompromising. Every day she would come into his room with a list of five tasks that seemed impossible to him. She never let a single one slide. Yet it was precisely because of her that, day after day, Mitchell managed to complete five more tasks that had seemed impossible at the outset.

After four months, Mitchell decided it was time to leave the hospital. The doctors objected, but Beverley argued that if Mitchell had chosen to take responsibility for his life, everyone should support that decision and prepare him for his new mission: managing his life outside the hospital. And so, it was.

2. Accept Yourself as You Are

Mitchell’s transition to life outside the hospital came with many difficulties. Countless trivial actions became challenges — and Mitchell would sometimes just lie in bed, crying and screaming in frustration. How do you open a door when you have no fingers and the lightest touch causes sharp pain? Gradually he learned that his thoughts could be either his prison or a doorway to creativity. He learned to open doors and turn on the TV with his foot, and to eat independently by fastening a rubber band to his hand.

But the most difficult ordeal was moving through the world among other people. Before the accident he had thought of himself as handsome — he had even had surgery on his chin to look more like the actors he admired in Hollywood films. Now he felt that people on the street avoided looking at him, and those who did speak to him avoided making eye contact.

One day, a group of children shouted after him: “Monster, monster.” Yet in that moment Mitchell felt not anger, but an awakening to the second principle: accept yourself as you are. He remembered that if you focus too much on the negative aspects of yourself, you actually reinforce them and prevent yourself from overcoming them. It is better to direct your energy toward what is good in you and what you succeed at — and those parts grow stronger, while the less successful ones gradually shrink.

American therapist Sean Stephenson was one of the most powerful advocates of self-acceptance. Stephenson was born with a severe condition that made his bones fragile and brittle. Doctors told his parents he would live only a few days, but they were proven wrong. His body was small, his face disfigured — but his spirit was enormous. He began leading motivational workshops at age 17, later married, completed an undergraduate degree, and wrote two motivational books.

“Don’t believe any forecast that doesn’t empower you,” Stephenson said in a TEDx talk. “If you believe a forecast that doesn’t empower you, you’ll be like a flower that wilts and dies a physical or spiritual death. If people who see me feel sorry for me, they’re wasting their time — because I chose a life of empowerment.” He explained that when people begin to pity themselves and feel insecure, they lose their sense of inner worth and begin seeking validation from outside. “You become your own prison, which is why you must love and cherish yourself.” He passed away at age 38. His final words: “This didn’t happen to me — it happened for me.”

3. You Can Choose How to Respond to Life’s Hardships

Mitchell gradually returned to an independent life. Six months after the accident, he returned to flying — first with an instructor, and after 50 hours of flight time, he was able to take off alone again. To mark this moving moment, he bought himself a brand new Cessna 206. He moved to a beautiful town in Colorado, became a successful businessman, and felt he had won the battle for his life.

But fate had other plans. In November 1975, a technical malfunction caused his plane to crash on the runway. All four passengers walked away unharmed — but Mitchell, just 32 years old, had severely hurt his back. He was paralyzed from the waist down and would be confined to a wheelchair for the rest of his life.

Outwardly Mitchell remained quiet, keeping his sarcastic sense of humor intact. But inside, he felt broken and despairing. After four years of rebuilding his life from the ashes of that fire, he found himself at rock bottom once again.

One day, while lying in the hospital drained of strength and motivation, he received a call from a woman who lived in his town. “You may not remember me,” she said, “but a year ago, when I was going through a very hard time, you said something I’ll never forget: ‘It’s not what happens to you, it’s how you respond to what happens.’ Do you still believe that?”

Her words hit him like lightning. At that moment he remembered that the very fire that had nearly taken his life was also the one that had allowed him to grow and change in ways he had never imagined. He told himself: You can choose how to respond to the hardships in your life — took a deep breath, and decided once again to see the hand he had been dealt as an opportunity for growth.

Mitchell began running his business from his hospital bed. He later learned to maneuver his wheelchair with skill — navigating streets, supermarkets, airports, and the campus of the University of Colorado, where he completed an MBA. His determination, courage, and financial success led him in 1977 to be elected mayor of Crested Butte, Colorado. But more than anything, he felt he was fulfilling his purpose when he stood on stage and lectured to struggling adults and youth across the United States, spreading messages of hope, strength, and courage.

In his talks he also shares the story of Eddie Jaku, a Holocaust survivor whose entire family was murdered in the camps. Jaku survived the horror of the camps and death marches, and for many years lived in bitterness and anger. But after meeting his wife, marrying, and having his first child, his heart opened again. “I promised myself that from that day on I would be happy and smile always, be kind and help others,” he said in a moving TEDx talk. “Happiness doesn’t fall on you from the sky — it is your responsibility. Happiness brings health to body and soul.”

Recalling every time he had faced death, Jaku was filled with gratitude for the life he had been given. “I no longer hate anyone,” he said. “Hatred is a disease — it may destroy your enemy, but along the way it destroys you too.” At age 99, a year before his death, he published a book about his life carrying an inspiring message of joy and hope. Mitchell tells his audiences that Jaku is an extraordinary person — but also an ordinary person, just like them. “Neither Jaku nor I have superpowers,” he says. “We simply chose to do what was right — and so can you.”

“Your life is what you decide it will be,” he tells his audiences. “It is your ship — and you decide when it sails and when it sinks. It all begins in your mind and spreads outward into the world. Change what happens in your head — and the world outside will change with it.”